Mrs...

You all know that I love Duran Duran. At the ripe old age of 12, I declared myself to be John Taylor's future wife. The other four were my backup plans if this thing with John didn't work out. Yes, the other guys were married, but I was counting on the celebrity marriage thing not working out for them. I wished them well while it lasted, though.

I noticed a common thread among the guys through interviews I read in various teen idol magazines: They kept mentioning being inspired musically by David Bowie.

David Bowie? I wondered. Oh yes! He was a strange character whose only videos I ever remembered seeing then were "Blue Jean" and "Let's Dance." Not knowing how he could have inspired my five heartthrobs as young lads when he only recently made two videos, I asked my mom if she ever head of this David Bowie.

Not only did she know who he was, she had some of his albums.

Albums? As in plural? As in he has done more than two songs? Not only did he do more than two songs, but these albums dated back around the time I was born! He has been making music like... forever!

Eager to hear the source of inspiration for my five betrothed, my record player introduced me to the sixth one.

Never had music spoken so powerfully to me! I cried over the dilemma of Major Tom in "Space Oddity," danced Egyptian-like to "The Man Who Sold the World," air-guitared with "Rosalyn," and gave my friends a listen to the naughty song, "Cracked Actor."

Every other week, a used-record store would take my allowance as I walked away with an old David Bowie album listing new mysteries I was dying to hear. Posters of Bowie were squeezed in next to Duran Duran and other darling faces that adorned my walls. The movie "Labyrinth" was a special treat for me because I also adore the work of Jim Henson. What could be more perfect?

I soon discovered that the video for "Blue Jean" was actually a small bit taken from a 20 minute film called "Jazzn' For Blue Jean." When the TV listings told me that VH1 was showing the FULL THING, I managed to copy it. In spite of the tracking static and grainy quality of the video recorders of the time, I was able to enjoy watching David Bowie for a full 20 minutes in a duel role at my leisure. Really, does life get any better?

Well, better or worse, life does goes on. I grew up (sort of) and met a man not mentioned above but should be mentioned in a love-you-forever type of song. I introduced him to David Bowie music. Having spent his childhood in Hungary, he never heard of Bowie before, but grew to like the music very much and borrowed much of my Bowie collection. Getting it all back was a problem, so what was I to do? Marrying him seemed a practical solution; after all, I was madly in love with him!

Sorry D5 and Bowie. You just weren't quick enough.